His hands were made for my vagina.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Can't talk, ducks in the car
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
