So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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