Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
