Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
