Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
