try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
