It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
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