Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
