I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
