The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
