i just wanna soil my oats bro
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Randomize
