I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Randomize
