Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Randomize
