dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
And my parents said I crawled through the house
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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