ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
This beer is not sobering me up at all
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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