Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
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