Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
