Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
