apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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