I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
