The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
We need to get me chipped asap
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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