I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
How external is "for external use only"?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
