is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
