Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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