Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
