walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
