We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize