I'm so fucking centered right now
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
