Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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