Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
