Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
