Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
