so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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