Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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