Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
