There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
