She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
