Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
