it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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