he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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