Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I wish you could order shots online.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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