She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Randomize