The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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