My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
