dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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