I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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