dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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