That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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