Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
