Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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